Sunday, May 1, 2011

Teenage angst

Who knew this would start the day after she turned 13?  It has been such a roller coaster and I can't figure out where it started.  Emma has always had body-image issues and we've always tried to counter it.  We try to tell her to be confident and that she doesn't look as big as she thinks she does but like every other adolescent out there, we are always wrong and she is always right. 

Today I seem to have hit my limit.  She is rude, obnoxious and uncooperative.

We went out shopping for t-shirts because we will be going away this summer and she needs to clothes that are appropriate for the weather.  Unfortunately, the only thing she wants to wear is black t-shirts and jeans.  Oh, and a hoodie.  It is 71 degrees celcius in our house and she's trying to put on her hoodie... I tried to get her try to put on something more appropriate and it was very nice and age appropriate.   She was utterly horrified, said she looked huge and was almost in tears.  She then went on about how she is fat, horrible, ugly and just worthless... so we've spent the rest of the day with her in a slump and everyone else trying to work around her and behave in a normal way.

I'm exhausted, fed up and out of patience. 

When I was a kid I was always told that I was worthless, useless, fat, ugly and that no one would love me.  I swore that I would never do that to my kids.  And I haven't.  We have both taken incredible pains to ensure that we try to put across positive messages.  I don't know where this behaviour of hers comes from.... I just don't get it.

That's it for now cause I could keep writing but it wouldn't accomplish very much.

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